my self-proclaimed metrosexual feminist male hist professor

i think my hist prof is super funny
check out what he wrote
"As someone who has spent his entire life in academia (every fall since 1970, when I started nursery school at the "Humpty-Dumpty House" in Santa Barbara, age three, I have been either a student or a teacher in some sort of educational institution), I've never held a full-time job other than college instructor. I know how to prepare a good lecture. I know how to evaluate written work quickly. I know how to pretend to pay attention in department meetings."
he's pretty hot too seriously. but he's at his 4th wife now, unfortunately.
"I learned that a microwave, a coffee maker, and a fridge are really all you need. (I've bought three post-divorce microwaves and two nice Kenmore refrigerators). On my own post-divorce, months would pass and I would never touch a stove. Lean Cuisines can be bought in bulk at Costco -- word to the wise. After my second divorce, I lived on Rosarita refried beans, Uncle Ben's rice, Pace Picante sauce, Knudsen sour cream, and corn tortillas. (What one friend called "the vile concoction.") I figure each divorce was good for some significant weight loss."
HE IS NOT FAT AT ALL.
"What else do I know that's useful? I know how to train for and run marathons. I know how to start a weight-lifting program. I could probably teach an introductory Pilates mat class, or a spinning class. I know how to pick the right pair of running shoes. Important skills for survival? Uh, no."
"I know that broken hearts heal and that new dishes can be bought over and over again. I know that dollar for dollar, it's hard to beat Sears brand appliances."
haha
okay before i start cnp-ing his entire post pls check him out here http://hugoboy.typepad.com/ and here http://hugoschwyzer.net/.

some search terms that got ppl to his blog (in italics) + his comments on them

steps to circumcise your own penis yourself (First step: get off the internet and call 911 and get thyself to a locked treatment facility. There’s a good boy.)
why are women such bitches nowdays? (Buddy, you’re reason #1)
chinchillas having sex (Chinchillas don’t wish to have this discussed or photographed. We know it happens, but we don’t talk about it).
should christian men go to water parks (As long as they don’t mind Christian children peeing in the water)
what school does **** ******* teach (Scary stalker people! I teach at, uh, Wichita State! No, wait, College of the Siskiyous!) -
**** ******* is his name. omg im one of the scary stalker ppl AHHhaha